ADHD and Autism: Walking the Same Path
As a mom of a child with both ADHD and Autism, I’m still learning every single day what it means to navigate life with them. What I’ve discovered so far is that these two conditions often run in the same realm—and while they share similarities, they are not the same thing. Understanding both, and how they overlap, has been one of the most powerful tools in helping my child (and myself) manage the challenges that come with them.
ADHD and Autism: How They Intersect
ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) and Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) are two different diagnoses, but they can look a lot alike. In fact, many kids (and adults) are diagnosed with both. Here’s why:
Both involve self-regulation challenges. This means difficulty with attention, emotions, and impulse control.
Both process the world differently. Sensory input, social situations, and changes in routine can feel overwhelming.
Both can mask or mimic each other. Sometimes hyperactivity looks like restlessness from sensory overload, or “zoning out” can be either inattention or autistic shutdown.
So when people ask: “Is it ADHD or Autism?”—the answer is often: “It might be both.”
What It’s Not: Bad Behavior
One of the hardest parts as a parent is watching others misunderstand. These kids are not “bad kids.” They are not “undisciplined” or “lazy.” What’s really happening is that their brains are wired differently, and they often struggle with regulation.
An outburst at school isn’t defiance—it’s a meltdown from overload.
A refusal to switch tasks isn’t stubbornness—it’s difficulty transitioning.
A “hyper” moment isn’t misbehavior—it’s energy that has nowhere to go.
When we shift the mindset from “won’t” to “can’t right now,” it changes how we respond.
Helping Kids Understand Themselves
Children with ADHD and Autism often feel “different” but can’t always explain why. Helping them put words to their experiences can empower them.
Explain it simply. “Your brain works like a race car—it’s super fast, but sometimes it needs help steering or slowing down.”
Normalize their challenges. Let them know that struggling with focus, feelings, or social things doesn’t make them “bad.”
Celebrate strengths. Many kids with ADHD and Autism are creative, detail-oriented, deeply caring, and full of curiosity.
The more they understand why they feel the way they do, the more they can build self-acceptance and confidence.
Helping Adults Understand Too
It’s not just kids who need to learn—it’s adults, too. Teachers, family members, coaches, and even strangers in the grocery store may not “get it.” Education and patience are key.
Share resources. Sometimes a quick explanation (“She has ADHD and Autism, so transitions are hard”) can open doors for compassion.
Ask for accommodations. Things like flexible seating, movement breaks, or sensory tools aren’t “special treatment”—they’re support.
Model empathy. When adults respond with understanding instead of judgment, kids notice and learn that it’s okay to be themselves.
What Helps in the Day-to-Day
I’m still figuring this out myself, but here are some strategies that help many families:
Routine and predictability. Both ADHD and Autism thrive on structure.
Visual supports. Charts, checklists, and schedules reduce overwhelm.
Sensory breaks. Headphones, weighted blankets, or quiet corners can help regulate.
Patience (with them and yourself). Some days are smooth, some are stormy. That’s okay.
Final Thoughts
Parenting a child with ADHD and Autism isn’t easy—it can feel exhausting and confusing at times. But it’s also full of moments that shine brighter because of their unique way of experiencing the world. They aren’t “bad kids.” They’re kids learning to regulate in a world that doesn’t always understand them.
And as parents, teachers, and community members, we’re learning right alongside them. The more we talk about ADHD and Autism together, the more we can create spaces of understanding, compassion, and support.
Note: I am not a licensed therapist, nor have I received formal training in this field. The information I share comes from personal research and strategies I have implemented—or plan to implement—within my own home. My goal is to provide insight into approaches that have supported my children and our family, as well as to share what has or has not been effective for us.